I remember the very first Valentine’s Day I spent with Trisha. It was 17 years ago today. I borrowed a friend’s car (that was much nicer than mine) and took her to a restaurant called Bennigan’s. I had the Monte Cristo sandwich. Trisha had a salad with Blue Cheese dressing. We went to the movies after dinner.
All through dinner I remember adding up how much my meal was; how much Trisha’s meal was and calculating if I had enough money in my checking account to pay for the movies. The truth is I had borrowed a friend’s car because I didn’t have any gas in my car to get to the restaurant and back. I didn’t have the money for dinner and definitely couldn’t afford the movie…but none of that mattered because I would have done anything to impress Trisha.
When we were dating, we would do the craziest things to be with one another. We would stay up late at night talking on the phone. We would playfully argue about who was going to hang up first. “No, you hang up.” “No, you hang up.” (Don’t pretend you didn’t do that.) We would go out of our way to see each other between classes even if we didn’t have class in the same building.
I remember one weekend I talked Trisha into coming to our house in Indiana to meet my parents. She could only stay for one day, but I didn’t care. We drove 3 hours to my house, and then the next day, I drove her 4 hours to her house, dropped her off and turned around and drove back. 11 hours of driving just so we could spend a little time together.
There was a sense when we were dating that we would do ANYTHING for love. (Insert Meatloaf song here) No distance was too long to travel. No conversation was too long. No date was too expensive. No love song was too cheesy. We wanted to be with each other. We wanted to know each other. We wanted to demonstrate how much we loved each other.
My guess is our story is very similar to your story. You too probably did everything you could to impress your husband. You probably went to great lengths to win your wife’s heart. You would do ANYTHING for love.
But maybe that isn’t the case these days. Life has happened and kids have happened and stress has happened. And while you didn’t set out to drift apart, it has just kinda played out that way.
Now you complain about driving 10 minutes to get a gallon of milk. Late night conversations have been replaced with reading or watching TV. Date nights are a thing of the past because you don’t have time or money or energy or interest.
What if this Valentine’s Day was different? What if today marked the beginning of something new in your marriage? What if you decided that you would do ANYTHING for love? You chose to engage in the conversation your wife desired? You gave your husband the same attention you give your co-workers each day? You set aside time to talk. You brought back some romance. You refused to allow life to get the best of the relationship you dreamed about. What if today was the day that you got the best of your spouse? That could change everything.