On Monday nights we usually go to the YMCA to work out, then join friends at Mexican Restaurant afterwards to undo everything we just accomplished at the gym. This past Monday we walked in and my youngest son started acting a little weird and got a funny look on his face. I didn’t think anything of it at the time. Trisha arrived a few minutes after me; sat down and said, “Did you see Isaiah’s girlfriend over there?” The weirdness made sense. I immediately stood up and pointed and stared at her and asked Isaiah if he wanted to introduce me. He did not.
We were driving home, just Isaiah and me, and I said, “Does your girlfriend really like you are does she just like you as friends?” “She really likes me!” “Really? How do you know?” “I wrote her a note and I said, ‘Do you like me? Yes or No please check one.’” I simply gave him a fist bump and said, “That move is so money. I’m proud of you.” We had a laugh and then I told him 9 year olds can’t have real girlfriends.
You remember when you used to write love notes? You remember when you first started dating your spouse how exciting it was? You remember when you used to pursue her? You remember when you couldn’t wait to see him?
My little conversation with Isaiah reminded me of a few things that could really help your marriage this week:
1. Pursue your spouse.
What if you asked your wife out on a date this Saturday? What if you found a babysitter; made reservations; cleared the calendar; bought flowers; and asked your wife if she would go out with you? What if you got up early tomorrow morning and made your husband breakfast in bed? What if you woke your husband up tomorrow morning and offered something else in bed? When is the last time you pursued your spouse? Not for you…but for them?
2. Write them a love note.
What if you wrote your husband a love note, telling him how much you love him. What if you sent your wife a text message right in the middle of a busy day? What if you sent your spouse an email listing all the things you love about them? It is one thing to say you love them. It is another thing to show how much you love them by putting it in writing.
3. Give a compliment.
When is the last time you told your husband he is sexy? When is the last time you told your wife how beautiful her eyes are? When is the last time you complimented her effort as a mom? When is the last time you said how much you appreciate all his hard work? When is the last time you gave a compliment…not to receive anything in return, just to give to them.
How you used to feel is very much connected to what you used to do.
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