Being Real Book

It Doesn't Have to Happen

Aug 28, 2022

Last year, Trisha did a powerful post on 5 Things to Do When Your Spouse Has Had An Affair. I wrote a post on 5 Things You Must Do When You’ve Had An Affair. While we know that part of our ministry is to help couples who are in marital crisis, our heart beats just as much for marriages that haven’t experienced infidelity.

With that said, we wanted to share today what we believe to be key decisions in preventing an affair (emotional, physical, virtual) in your marriage.

  • Pray consistently with and for each other
  • Carve out time to talk and dream together
  • Have sex AT LEAST once per week

We have talked to couples that haven’t been intimate with one another in over 6 months, sometimes a year. This is a huge issue you need to resolve.

  • Extinguish Fatal Attractions

If you are feeling an attraction to someone other than your spouse, tell your spouse. That confession will cost you something, but not nearly as much as hiding it.

  • Commit to choose what’s right and not what’s easy
    • It’s easy to go to bed mad
    • It’s easy to avoid talking about a struggle
    • It’s easy to see your spouse as the enemy
    • It’s easy to compromise time together
    • It’s easy to not set moral boundaries
    • It’s easy to not resolve conflict
    • It’s easy to hide rather than live in truth

We know that we haven’t created an exhaustive list here. What would you add to this that we can all learn from?