Come to Our Retreat!

Joy Comes After Mourning

Aug 29, 2022

Psalm 30:5 says:

 Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning.

As awesome and encouraging this scripture is joy didn’t come to our house this past Monday morning. It should have, we’d sold our house in Zionsville, Indiana after moving out of it over four years ago. We were set to close Monday afternoon. Four years ago our boys were thirteen, eleven and six. Now our older two boys are in high school and our youngest is in middle school. So much has changed since our hot and sunny move to Nashville, July of 2009.

Our decision to move in order to step back into ministry at Cross Point Church was one of the scariest moves we ever made and we’ve moved a lot! This move came with unknowns and risks of failure and defeat if it didn’t work out. We’d spent the previous four years healing and dreaming not just as a couple but as a family for what ministry opportunities lie ahead.

Our children were choosing to risk it all alongside us, which also meant leaving the “Healing Place” our home had become. Transition meant saying good-bye to the familiar, comfort and community we had built in Indiana. We were trusting God to move our family from a place of healing and dreaming to actually stepping into those dreams.

I love how Tsh Oxenreider writes it in her book “Notes From A Blue Bike”

“People are willing to be brave when they admit their smallness within the enormity of the world, and the best way to understand our smallness is to leave our comfort zones and start exploring, one foot in front of the other.”

Four years ago we said good-bye to the “Healing Place” to return to full-time ministry. We all struggled with saying good-bye and often questioned if we were doing the right thing. But I believe our whole family would agree we have no regrets. God has shown-up in the good and the bad as our family has relentlessly pursued Him.

I wrote a post about saying good-bye to the “Healing Place” four years ago. The day we moved was the day I (Trisha) said good-bye. Even though we were only renting out our house I knew deep down we would never return. I sobbed and laughed and sobbed again as I allowed my mind to drift from one cherished memory to the next. My grieving had begun and after a year of being in our new surroundings, I enthusiastically anticipated what God had for us in Nashville.

I assumed Justin had too.

This past Monday morning we were set to close on the house and officially say goodbye. Joy had definitely come to my heart. I was beaming with excitement at the thought of finally getting to search for our own house here in Nashville. But my joy quickly turned to confusion and chaos.

Justin was on the phone with the husband of the family purchasing our “Healing Place” house. His breathing was labored, coupled with a panicked tone in his voice as he paced the room. My heart sank and all I could think was “the loan fell through”. But as I listened to the conversation I realized the deal was in full swing but there was something not sitting right with Justin, to the point he was borderline loosing his mind and temper.

So I did what every good wife would do… I took the phone from him. To say he was not happy with my act of peacekeeping is an understatement. As I engaged in conversation with the buyer to figure out what was going on, Justin was unraveling. We tried to calmly resolve the purchase agreement and agreed it was exactly what it needed to be, which left me even more puzzled as to why Justin had become so indignant.

I quickly ended our conversation in order to get to a meeting for which I was already late. Within an hour I received the news the house was sold. Although joy missed our house that morning I was certain it would make an appearance early afternoon.

I was wrong.

As I returned home, I sat with Justin at our dinning room table. Before he was even seated he collapsed his head into his folded arms with tears of grief falling from his cheeks. With his lips quivering he simply said: “That’s our house. That’s where we fell back in love. That’s were we became a new family. It’s so hard to say good-bye.”

His countenance during our morning phone call was all starting to make sense. I started to shed my own tears and we just sat and cried. Justin for the first time was truly saying good-bye to a house that was so much more than a house, but truly a place God healed and mended our marriage and family.

Joy did finally come, it just happened to be more like mid-afternoonish.

Our weeping was followed by a deep sense of joy for all God has done in our family. We were overwhelmed with joy as we reminisced about ALL he continues to do. God has big plans for our family!

Sometimes our deepest sorrows can bring us to a place where we become deeply rooted in the knowledge of God.

No matter if your marriage is in the midst of joy or sorrow God is always eagerly awaiting for us to draw closer to him.

When your spouse experiences sorrow God isn’t asking you to fix them but rather comfort them until joy comes, and it will come…even if it’s late afternoonish.