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The Journey vs The Destination

Aug 28, 2022

**Disclaimer: On Sunday night Trisha and I sat in two different rooms writing blog posts. She wrote her post yesterday, and I wrote this post. Neither of us knew how God had laid such similar things on our hearts. I love it when God works that way.**

Last month, Trisha and I celebrated 15 years of marriage. We also celebrated our oldest son Micah’s 14th birthday. Just typing that feels weird. We don’t feel old enough to have a 14 year old.

It is a very interesting season of life, because our oldest son and our youngest son are 7 years apart in age, but look very much alike. As I watch my youngest son, I think about Micah at his age. Micah had some friends come over to celebrate his birthday on Sunday, and as I sat and watched them at the pool I thought to myself:

“How much of the journey did I miss because I was so focused on the destination?”

When Micah was 7, I was busy building a church. I’ve always been busy building something…a reputation, a student ministry, a bank account, an image, a fund raising plan, a leadership structure, an organization.

Here is the tricky thing…none of these things are bad. But the focus I had on what was next usually clouded my enjoyment of what was now.

As a husband, I wanted to figure out how to have a better job; how to have a bigger house; how to have a newer car; how to take better vacations; how to save more money; how to have more toys. Arriving was more important than becoming.

As a father, I was waiting for the boys to crawl; then walk; then talk; then get out of diapers; then get in a big boy bed; then go to school; then play sports.

As a pastor, my whole focus was on the destination. I can’t wait until we have a building; I can’t wait till we have 50 people; 100 people; 300 people; 500 people; 700 people; I can’t wait until we go to two services; I can’t wait until next Easter, its going to be bigger and better than this Easter.

There is nothing wrong with having goals. I’m not saying there is anything wrong with being driven. I’m not suggesting that a person, a marriage, a family, a church, a business shouldn’t grow and improve.

But when we pursue the destination more passionately than we do the journey, we often miss both altogether.

Focusing on the destination allows you to achieve some goals and experience some success, but there is always a cost.

Seeking the destination has:

  • Cost me joy
  • Robbed me of memories
  • Caused me stress
  • Made me ungrateful
  • Left me discontent

What I have discovered is that God’s presence finds me on the journey. He is more concerned with who I am becoming than where I am arriving. Oddly enough, so is my wife; so are my kids.

What I have realized (often the hard way) is:

  • Intimacy grows on the journey
  • Moments are created on the journey
  • Contentment is found on the journey
  • Gratitude is overwhelming on the journey
  • Life is savored on the journey

Is there an area of your life that your focus on the destination has robbed you of joy in the journey?