Making Up For It

Almost every day we get emails from people who are experiencing the pain, loss and devastation of an affair. They are wounded and hurt and don’t know what to do or where to turn. They want their life back; their marriage back; their spouse back. Often as we read through the emails and then...

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Desire vs. Commitment

January 3, 2012…I am four pounds away from my heaviest weight, ever. Just typing that brings up feelings of shame and embarrassment. I’ve written in the past about avoidance being my drug of choice…the past few months I’ve been avoiding the scale. I wanted to...

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3 Fears that Hold You Back

We have great intentions don’t we? If our life was measured by our intentions we would all be very successful in all aspects of life. We intend to have great marriages. We intend to have deep friendships. We intend to be completely honest. We intend to share all of our heart. We intend to...

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Enemies of Peace

One of the promises of Christmas is peace. Right after Jesus was born, angels appeared to a group of shepherds and announced that Jesus would bring peace on earth and goodwill toward men. The Bible promises those of us that are followers of Christ that we will have a “peace that surpasses...

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The Deepest of All Lies

Divorce doesn’t happen all at once. Addictions don’t take hold overnight. Relationships don’t usually just implode. There is a slide into divorce. There is a gradual accent into addiction.  There is a subtle breakdown in relationships.

Most of the time, our character...

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Ashamed to Be Naked

Have you ever read a passage of Scripture that you have read 100 times before, but for some reason in that moment it hits you in a different way than it ever did before? That happened to me the other day.

Genesis 2:25 “The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.”

...

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One Word that Keeps Your Marriage Mediocre

There is a litmus test in our marriage that has 100% accurate results. We can tell our marriage is drifting into mediocre when one word is used. As we speak at conferences and spend time coaching couples we hear this same word repeated over and over again. It is a small word, but...

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Succeeding as a Pastor, Failing as a Parent Part 5

Today’s post is the last of the five part series here at RefineUs talking about parenting. One of the things I’ve learned over the past six years is finding my identity in anything other than Christ, causes me to compromise relationships to maintain that identity. The truth about both...

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Succeeding as a Pastor, Failing as a Parent Part 4

We’re continuing this blog series today called Succeeding as a Pastor but Failing as a Parent. You can read the rest of the posts here:

Introduction

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

 

The goal for this series is to share with you some mistakes that I made in the first 10 years of being a parent...

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Succeeding as a Pastor, Failing as a Parent Part 3

I remember the first time we sat the boys down in December 2005,  to talk to them about the timing of me moving back home. We had just come back from a counseling appointment and felt like the time was right to begin this conversation. Our boys were ages 9, 6 and 3 at the time so our...

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Succeeding as a Pastor, Failing as a Parent Part 2

Today, we’re continuing the blog series on five mistakes I made as a father, while doing my best to succeed as a pastor. Some of these mistakes won’t be exactly relevant to everyone, but my prayer is that the principles shared will help you as a parent.

Trisha and I left vocational...

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Succeeding as a Pastor, Failing as a Parent Part 1

We are launching a series of posts today where I will be sharing how I at times in my life I was more successful in my career as a pastor than I was in my calling as a parent. Our prayer is that God will use my mistakes to help you grow as a parent.

A few weeks ago, I wrote a post on The...

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