It's Easy to Drift

Most people don’t get married so they can be unhappy. Most people don’t stand in front of a church full of people and pledge their love for each other thinking they will be standing in a courtroom dividing their property and arguing over custody of their kids.

Most marriages just...

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The Practice of Remembering

If I’m honest, I can get to a place in my life where God’s grace is routine. The story of the Cross becomes familiar. The Easter story is just that…a story.

I want to live with a moment by moment awareness of and gratitude for grace. Over the past five years, I have tried to...

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Redemption from Failure Part 2

Yesterday, I shared with you two reasons why we forfeit the work God longs to do in our heart when we fail. God’s desire is redemption. But so often we think we can redeem ourselves.

1. We hide our failures.

2. We aren’t sorry (to the point of change) for our failures.

God longs to...

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Redemption From Failure

Over the past two years, we’ve been asked several times how God has turned the mess of our lives into our message? How have we allowed God to use such a broken part of us for His purpose? How have we found redemption from our failure? Today and tomorrow, I want to talk about the process of...

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3 People You Have to Tell the Truth

3 people to whom we have to speak truth:

1. Tell the truth to yourself.

The greatest of all deception is self-deception.

Writer Mike Novak says: “Our capacity for self-deception has no known limits.” The prophet Obadiah in the Old Testament says it like this: “The...

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Shifting Our Values

There is no doubt I have made a lot of mistakes in life and marriage. Most of them are written about on this blog. One of the biggest mistakes I have made as I have tried to follow Christ and as I have tried to grow as a husband and father is trying to change my behavior without changing my...

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The Path to an Affair

Last Monday I got a text message from a good friend. The text said, “I need your help. A friend of mine is a pastor and he has confessed an affair. I don’t know what to do to help.”

The text broke my heart. It broke my heart for this pastor. It broke my heart for his wife and...

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What Might Have Been

We were backing out of the driveway a few days ago and our 8 year-old son Isaiah said, “It makes me really sad that Nana and Grand-dad got divorced.” (Two years ago my parents got divorced after 36 years of marriage.)

Isaiah continued, “Why did they get divorced?” Elijah,...

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Delayed Healing

I remember the first time a good friend of mine confronted me about not telling the truth. They had approached Trisha a few days before and voiced their concerns, and got her permission to talk to me about it. This person listed a few examples of times that I had exaggerated details in...

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Culture of Grace

Every family has a culture. Every relationship develops a culture. Every friendship, every marriage has a culture…they have DNA; they have things that they are known for and make them distinctive.

When the affair happened in 2005, our family’s culture was exposed. There was no hiding...

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Never Stop Fighting
To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best day and night to make you everybody else, means to fight the hardest battle any human being can fight, and never stop fighting.  E.E. Cummings

More than anything else your wife needs you to be you today.

More than anything else...

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3 Year Glitch

Yesterday, my friend Steve sent me a link to this article.

The opening sentence of the article says:

The “three-year glitch” has replaced the “seven-year itch” as the tipping point where couples start to take each other for granted, according to a new...

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