Succeeding as a Pastor, Failing as a Parent

I know that I’ve shared this story publicly before, but I don’t think I’ve shared it here on our blog.

When Trisha and I were separated in 2005, the boys came to the house in which I was staying for a weekend visit. Our boys were 9, 6 and 3 at the time. I began to explain to...

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Home for the Holidays

This week will be one of the biggest traveling weeks of the year. Over the next month, many of us will travel to see family and spend time with relatives. That can be an awesome thing; but it can also be a stressful thing. For so many of us, the Holidays are a reminder of what is broken in our...

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Why It Isn't Working

If you’ve been married for any amount of time you probably have your list. There is a mental list that you accumulate and depending on the argument; depending on the hurt; depending on the harsh word that was spoken; it is a that continues to get longer and longer. It’s the list of...

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The Moments that Make Us

Life isn’t made up of one big event that defines us, but rather small moments that collect in our heart and mind as we go through life. I had the opportunity to witness one of those moments play out in the life of our son, Micah a few weeks ago.

In June 2009, we were given an opportunity go...

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Why We Struggle

Trisha and I have been traveling a lot the past two months speaking at marriage events. We’ve been honored to see God work powerfully in the lives of so many couples. One thing has been consistent at every event we’ve been: a lot of marriages are struggling. I know there have been...

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Learning to Lead Spiritually

I learned a lot about this community yesterday.  Here is what I learned: A lot of us guys really want to lead our family spiritually, we just have no clue how to do it. I also realized that I am not alone and I’m not crazy. Spiritual leadership is hard.

I want to say upfront that I...

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I'm a Horrible Spiritual Leader

I’ve always wanted to be a leader. From the time I was a kid I admired leadership. I wanted to be a leader at school. I wanted to be a leader on my teams. When I went to college, I learned that God placed a call in my life to be a leader in the Church. All of those leadership roles felt...

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Always in a Hurry

Just a few weeks before the affair began, I found myself with a way out. I had a chance to extinguish the forest fire before it ever started. This choice would have saved my marriage. This would have allowed me to continue being the pastor of our church. I could have saved so many relationships...

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In Pursuit Part 2

On Tuesday, Justin wrote about the art of pursuing your wife so today I thought I’d tackle the art of pursuing your husband. So often after we get married we lose our tenacity to pursue one another like we did when we were dating. What once was a blissful opportunity to show how much we...

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In Pursuit

An object in possession seldom retains the same charm that it had in pursuit.” -Pliny the Elder

One of the biggest changes we have made in our marriage over the past 6 years in our pursuit of one another. It isn’t that we intentionally stopped pursuing each other…it just...

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4 Words that Change Everything

There are very few words that transcend circumstances. There are very few words that go beyond social, economic and marital status. There are very few words that hit all of us in the same way, at the same time and with the same potential for impact and change. But these 4 words do:

“I am...

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Unmerited Redempiton

Six years ago this week, I was anything but a church leader. I was a church wounder. I was just a few days removed from telling my wife of 10 years that I no longer wanted to be married to her. I admitted to an affair that devastated every person that I loved and that loved me. I was living four...

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