You Are Not Weak

I often wonder if we are just fooling ourselves in The Church. We say that we want “authentic community”. We say that we value transparency, honesty, being real and coming as you are. Yet almost every day,  I talk to Christians that have spent most of their Christian life being...

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It Will Be Hard

I often forget how hard life can be. I mean, I realize it and live in it, then I get comfortable and complacent and get surprised by it.

Friendship is hard.

Marriage is hard.

Integrity is hard.

Parenting is hard.

Leading is hard.

Family dynamics are hard.

At different times through out the...

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One Day at a Time

We are coming up on the five-year anniversary of my affair. Five years since we lost so much. Five years that we have been gone from the church we started and love. Five years of hard work. Five years of reshaping dreams. Five years of mercy and second chances.

In many ways it has been a long...

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Life and Death

Our words carry power. They have the power to usher in life or the power to bring about death. There are days that I live in this and get this right.

I breathe life into my kids. I build up my wife. I am life-giving to my friends. Then there are times that I take this truth for granted. I run...

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Pastor You Are Not

Yesterday, I wrote a post about Who YOU Are. At the end of the day yesterday, I felt like God laid it on my heart to write a post for pastors who may be struggling with their identity.

As a pastor, I lived for 10 years with an identity crisis that eventually  lead to my ...

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You Are Not

You are not your past

You are not your failures

You are not your parents

You are not your sister

You are not your regrets

You are not your sin

You are not your weight

You are not your divorce

You are not your unemployment

You are not the choices someone else made for you

You are not your...

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Adding Value

I add value with words.

Well, that is a HUGE assumption.

More accurately, I attempt to add value through words.

I feel most comfortable in ministry; in my marriage; in my relationship with my kids; in my friendships, adding value through words that I speak.

I’ve always been good...

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Are You Addicted

I’ve had this post as a draft for about a month now. I’ve been praying about it and hoping what I share helps someone find freedom.

I remember the first time I admitted my addiction to pornography. It was 4 years and 50 weeks ago. I went over to a friend’s house, thinking my...

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5 Things I Wish I Knew Before I Got Married Part 2

Justin kicked off this mini-series the other day with his 5 Things. Today, I want to share with you 5 Things I wish I knew before we got married. We hope these things are helpful to you as you prepare for marriage or as you grow in your marriage.

1. Doing everything the “Right...

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5 Things I Wish I Knew Before I Got Married

Today and tomorrow, we are going to do something at RefineUs we hope will be very helpful.  Each of us will be sharing 5 Things We Wish We Knew Before We Got Married. I’m sharing today, and Trisha will be sharing with you tomorrow.

(For the record, I have like 20 things I...

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Choose Right Not Easy

As a father and husband, most of my choices aren’t between right and wrong. I don’t struggle most of the time with choices that I know are going to hurt my kids or my wife. The temptation that I face most of the time are between choices that are easy verses those that are right. Easy...

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It's a Battle

One of the biggest mistakes I make as a Christian is that I underestimate the spiritual battle I’m a part of every day.

For years, I thought that people who talked about spiritual warfare were a little off their rocker. I knew it was in the Bible…but in my mind…it wasn’t...

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