Whatever It Takes

One of the things that I love about my wife is that she is a “whatever it takes” kind of person. She’s always been this way. When we got engaged we knew that our parents couldn’t afford to pay for our entire wedding. Trisha took a semester off of school to move home, work...

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When The Ending Isn't Happy

  

On Friday, we received an email that brought tears to my eyes. Here is an excerpt of that email:

I love all the encouraging stories of marriage being restored. I’m just wondering what about the ones that don’t. My husband has choose to file divorce and not have anything...

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2 Words that Will Kill Your Marraige

There are so many things that your marriage can survive. You marriage can survive miscommunication. Your marriage can survive busy schedules. Your marriage can overcome conflict with your in-laws. Your marriage can get through sexual brokenness and unforgiveness. But, there are two words that...

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A Little at a Time

I remember sitting in a Starbucks parking lot in October 2005, killing time before my first counseling session with Trisha since our separation. We had only seen each other once since I confessed the affair. I was nervous. I was hopeful. I didn’t want to mess this up along with everything...

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Who He Is or What He Gives

In Exodus 33, Moses is presented with a pretty unique offer. God promises Moses to give the nation of Israel  all the things He has promised.

God says, go and inherit the Promised Land…he’ll take care of everything. He’ll defeat their enemies; he’ll guarantee a land...

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A Do Over

There are so many times I want a do over:

As a husband.

As a father.

As a friend.

As a Christ-follower.

Today is a day I wish I had a do-over as a pastor. Trisha and I leave today for a quick trip to Indiana. We are attending the visitation and funeral for a long-time family friend. About 8 years...

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Believe In You

You had a dream.

You had a vision.

You had a purpose.

You had a marriage.

You had a relationship with your kids.

Today…you’re tired.

You’ve lost your belief that you can be the mom you wanted to be.

You’ve lost hope you can be the husband she needs you to be.

You’ve...

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Staying Pure When We're Apart

Trisha and I have spent more time apart this summer than we have at any time since our separation five and a half years ago. I’d be lying if I said that it hasn’t brought up questions and concerns and conversations. I’ve been free from pornography for almost six years. It no...

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Stop Walking on Egg Shells

I met with a couple the other day that had lost almost all hope for their marriage. They love each other. They just don’t like each other. They don’t like being around one another. Why? Because all they do is fight.

Been.

There.

There isn’t a more miserable way to live than on...

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The High Cost of Control

One of the most consistent enemies I have to my relationship with God is this thing called “control.” Control is my ability to believe that I can lead and guide my life, my marriage, my relationships better than God. Control always makes promises it can never keep. God doesn’t...

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Being on the Same Page

When you get married, you have this belief that the person you are marrying is on your side. They are in your corner. If the whole world turns against you, this person will stand by your side. They will defend you. They are for you. They believe in you. You are on the same team.

Over the course...

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5 Things I Wish I Knew Before I Became a Parent

Trisha and I got married the summer before my senior year in college. We were 20 and 21 years old, respectively. Four months after we got married, Trisha got pregnant. We didn’t know all that we didn’t know about parenting. As Micah, our oldest son prepares to go to high school,...

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